oh Michael, I am so sorry to read you have lost your best mate, grief is hard, and even harder with chronic pain, it does make the pain more unbearable and it is hard to keep going, but somehow we all keep taking baby steps...
great you lost that way although stomach surgery wouldnt have been fun
im using CBD oil and doesnt help my back, but it has kicked my depression out of the park, i thought about stopping it, but after 5 days i was starting to think dark thoughts and isolating myself, so i started back on it, back wise - im up the creek too... my stim only targets the nerve spasms but i have severe arthritis, bone on bone and my fusion hardware has loosened, and causing damage to the level below, see my surfeon again in a few weeks, and go from there
Hi Michael, condolences on the loss of your dear friend. Grief is such a horrible heart breaking feeling. In March last year I lost a dear friend , my 18yo little dog and my 4week old grandson all in a week. The guilt and grief I am dealing with for my grandson is still too much to bare some days. All I can say is if you feel like crying , cry , cry while the tears still flow. I found trying to not cry at certain times just built up and didn’t help. My pains are no better also. I get my 6 th injection tomorrow, I have still got quit a few to go. My poor old body is just crumbling. I could reasonably cope with my spine pain as I knew I always still had good feet and knees, so still had my mobility even if I was bent and limping. But my feet have given me so much grief. My pain dr said it’s coming from my lumbar. It’s just so darn painful just to put my feet down and walk. I won’t cope if I loose my mobility. Harpy
I know how you feel I have lost four great mates in the last four years 3 in the last 12 months ex RAAF and it was the big C .
All of them were too young to leave it’s a horrendous illness they fade before your eyes .
One was diagnosed with throat cancer and told he had a month to finalise his affairs and that’s what he had one month .
This is a disease that they should be doing a lot more to fix .
Sad for your loss mate just know we are here for you
as long as I wake up alive I'm happy
Because it could be worse
Johnno I can certainly relate. With the 6 man fire crew my bro was part of he was the last to get cancer from the fire fighting foam used in the services and fire brigades.
In my mates case he and his family and mates were riding a roller coaster for 10 weeks of ‘this is not good’ ‘this is improving’ ‘getting better’ ‘back in ICU’ ‘On temp dialysis’ ‘heart attack’ ‘comes good’ ‘back in general ward’ ‘constant tests’ ‘downhill again’ ‘comes good’ ‘kidneys failing’ kidney count coming good’ ‘ High liver count’ etc etc etc
4 days prior to passing away he’s told he’s terminal with Non Hodgkin Lymphoma ... He passed peacefully.
So really up until the last few days there was never any mention of ‘your going to die’ We all thought he would battle through and though he would have to deal with life changing aspects it came as a shock to get his phone call ‘Bro, I’m terminal’
If there is a gliding light, it’s his suffering didn’t continue for many more months.
Hard to believe a Month has almost gone by (tomorrow)
Hope your doing ok Michael. You can cherish your friendship forever that will always be there, although just in a little different way now. He will forever listen to you.
My grief for my little grandson come to a head this week. My daughter had a little girl . All the guilt has come back so hard. But now my granddaughter has two big brothers . A very protective 5 year old and an angel looking over her. She is just the sweetest little bub. Who has giving us all a little hope . I am too scared to leave her, I watch every breath she takes to make sure she keeps breathing. I often move her to make sure she is moving. Harpy